Die Standing
by DramaQueen4eva
Summary: This is all the fault of hormones ... PMS is evil ... Songfic ... Final Battle Scenario ... AU fifth year already happened ... no one's dead ... read ... it is thought provoking to say the least and well just read and see .... :


Disclaimer: me no own … you no sue 

'**Sara's' pov**

She checked her appearance one last time before stepping out onto the stage at the crowded club 'NightLife' in muggle London. Taking a deep breath she started to sing her song the song she had written about her life

Black eyes, I don't need 'em 

_Blue tears, gimme freedom_

_Oh yeah_

_Oh_

_Positive_

_-ly never goin' back_

_I won't live_

_Where things are so out of whack_

_No more rollin'_

_With the punches_

_No more usin' or abusin' _

_I'd rather die standing_

_Than live on my knees_

_Begging please_

_No more_

Black eyes, I don't need 'em 

_Blue tears, gimme freedom_

_Black eyes, all behind me_

_Blue tears'll never find me now_

_Definite_

_-ly found my self-esteem_

_Finally_

_I'm forever free to dream_

_No more cryin'_

_In the corner_

_No excuses, no more bruises_

_I'd rather die standing_

_Than live on my knees_

_Begging please_

_No more_

Black eyes, I don't need 'em 

_Blue tears, gimme freedom_

_Black eyes, all behind me_

_Blue tears'll never find me now_

_I'd rather die standing_

_Than live on my knees, begging please_

Black eyes, I don't need 'em 

_Blue tears, gimme freedom_

_Black eyes, all behind me_

_Blue tears'll never find me now_

_It's all behind me, they'll never find me now_

_(Spoken) Find your self-esteem and be forever free to dream_

As the audience who wasn't too drunk to understand gave their applause, she left the stage feeling sacred after having bared herself, her true self to a building full of strangers, and yet at the same time happier and lighter than she had for a long time, almost as though in admitting to the abuse that had been a focal point of her life to date was unable to get her now, gave her back her self esteem and left her forever free to dream. Then a voice said "Fancy seeing you here,"

'Andrea's' pov 

As the singer started her song she couldn't help but raise her eyes from her glass of vodka and orange, she had never heard a song that more accurately described her home life. In fact the abuse was a major factor in why she was sitting in a club drinking alcohol when she had only just turned sixteen. The song had obviously been written by someone who had lived with abuse and was now out of the situation. Looking at the girl singing, she had a vague feeling of knowing her from somewhere, but … no … it couldn't be … getting up slowly from her table she left her drink there and headed slowly over towards the door that lead to the 'backstage' area. On her way slapping away groping drunk hands from her buttocks, she made it side stage just as the girl finished the song. Allowing the girl to get off stage before making her presence known, she then said "Fancy seeing you here"

The girl was shocked to say the least, and probably didn't recognize her. She continued with "Never thought I'd see you in a muggle club … what gives?" The other girl seemed to have figured out who she was, or at least who she had been where as she replied, "I wasn't exactly planning on running into you here either you know, maybe we should go to my dressing room and talk there." To which 'Andrea' merely nodded before following her round to a small door that lead to a … well … large closet.

Nobody's pov 

Both girls stared at each other for a moment before one took the first step,

"Hello my name is Hermione Andrea Granger, call me Andrea or Rea, Hermione is officially dead as off the end of 5th year … your turn"

The other smiled before saying, "Pleased to meet you Rea, my name is Pansy Sara Parkinson, call me Sara for the same reasons." Both girls then shared a smile before Rea asked, "So have you got anywhere to live … cos if not there's plenty of room in my flat … Grams left it to me so no one can kick us out or question us as to why two 16 yr olds are living in a flat" Sara smiled and replied "Thank god, I didn't have a clue where I was going to sleep tonight, and one night at Millie's house is enough for anyone…" Both girls exchanged yet another smile, before grabbing their stuff and hiking off to Rea's apartment in muggle London. insert very long and involved girl talk scene … we've all done it and I'm way too lazy to actually write it down … both girls bond and become firm friends after sharing stories of their life (including abuse ones) 

6 weeks l8r 

Rea was just making coffee while Sara molassesed the crumpets (ohhh yummy) when suddenly a rather perplexed Remus Lupin apparated into the kitchen. He was even more surprised when 'Hermione' spun around like a startled rabbit before realizing it was him and relaxing. "Hermione … why aren't you at your families house? And why is Miss Parkinson with you?" Rea sighed before advising him to sit down as it was a long story, upon seeing that Rea was going to trust the werewolf Sara got more crumpets ready while Rea made another mug of coffee. When the breakfast was all ready and the girls had both sat down 'Hermione' started.

"I'm going by the name Andrea now Remus, Rea for short, and Sara is here because we are flatting together as our ummm families both have the same ummmm problem" at which point Sara interrupted to say "Rea your making it confusing, what she really means is we both have left behind abusive family situations and as we now are different people we are using our middle names instead of our given names, it doesn't hurt as much and helps with the whole leaving the emotional baggage behind." Remus just stared at the two girls, who seemed different if not happier and more light hearted than he had ever seen either of them before. Remus then sighed and said "Well you two had better hurry up and pack, we are expected back at HQ very soon ," and then when they didn't move "Scoot!"

Both girls skittered off to pack and raced into their shared bedroom (no magic remember … Grams left Rea the flat fully furnished, including queen size bed which they both slept in … best friends (girls anyway) do that sorta thing) amazed that he was accepting the story so easily, for though the truth it was almost unbelievable, but Rea reasoned out loud that he knew they weren't lying because of his werewolf senses.

HQ (12 Grimmwauld Place) 

After explaining everything to Sara Remus had port keyed (shudder) them there. Where they were met with a million questions. Which they answered quickly as they could. Sara was rather nervous about the reaction everyone would have to her being there … it wasn't as if she could bond with everyone there through girl talk … But Rea seemed to sense this and linked arms with her before dragging her into the place to go see everyone.

When Rea finally (about five minutes later) found Harry and Ron they both looked gob-smacked about the change in her appearance over the last month and a bit that she had no choice but to divert there attention from her to something else … i.e. Sara. So she introduced her as "hey guys this is Sara my best gal pal and flat mate," Both boys then turned there attention to Sara before Harry asked stupidly … "Hey have I seen you somewhere before … do you go to Hogwarts? Your not in Griffindor though are you?" Rea practically thumped him, as it was she sighed and muttered "Gawd could you be any more dense?" before her rhetorical question was answered by Ron going "Hermione I didn't know you had any friends that were girls … apart from Ginny". Sara giggled before whispering in Rea's ear … "well you did ask", to which Rea nodded. Basic explanation given about situation … that they were who they now are and why and so on and so forth … yes I know I'm very lazy but my muse is nonexistent so not my fault 

That night Rea, Sara, Ginny and Luna did the whole girl talk thing in the 'girls room' while Harry , Ron and Neville tried to figure it all out in the 'boys room'. It was about 4am when the girls were finally settling down to get some sleep and suddenly their door opens and in creeps Sirius trying to prank them, them being awake results in it not working and the screaming girls almost bringing his family home down around his ears. He then beat a hasty retreat while everyone else came staggering sleepily … and those whose rooms were closer rather more awake … where upon everyone decided to blame Sirius utterly and completely … before Molly confiscated his supply of chocolate and other such sweeties.

Skip ahead to September 1 the end of the train trip 

Professor Snape had just gotten back from a D.E. meeting and was rushing up to Dumbledore (or Bumblebee and he will be hence forth called)'s office. Voldemort had just announced that he was planning to take a huge step and bring the final battle to Hogwarts during the welcome feast. Seeing as the schmoozle at the department of mysteries had made it blatantly obvious even to the bumbling buffoon of a minister that he was back, he had to attack the center of power on the light side, before they got their act together and stopped him. Snape explained such to Bumblebee who merely twinkled and said "Well Severus me boy, if the best offence is a good defense then our best defence shall have to be a good offense, I'll have Hagrid keep the first and second year students all on the train, actually the third and fourth years as well I think, and the rest will have the choice to take a stand or stay in the train, will you be fighting Severus, if this really is going to be the final battle your participation will be expected and appreciated."

So Bumblebee used his loud speakerish spell thing and told everyone what was going on. Naturally Harry decided that he was going to play hero, while everyone else would stay behind because of the prophecy saying that only he could defeat Voldemort with the power he knows not, but similarly the gang all came along for as Rea put "Harry, I don't know about everyone but I know Sara and I at least would rather die standing then live on our knees, and it's our choice anyway." When Sara interrupted her and said "so lets go out there and kick some death eater and dark lord ass!"

Then followed said battle of epic proportions with the usual horrors of war occurring everywhere you looked … many died in that fight but in the end Voldie was killed and then rekilled at least four times before his body was trapped in crystal via a spell 

After the battle when all the injured had been taken care of Harry and co. (gee haven't you figured out yet how damn lazy I am?) gathered together with Remus and Sirius, and were talking about after battle stuff … like wondering who hadn't made it … when Bumblebee (yes he's still alive … yes he is bloody un killable … yes its that time of the month and I have turned into the bitch queen from hell thanks to PMS …) turned up with one Severus Snape and one Draco Malfoy (what? He is too cute in movie number 4 at the tournament in the blk suit to be evil, scarred or killed off) who had both made the right choice when it counted (i.e. b4 the battle) and where know with bumblebee so they could meet up and relax with the war hero's who were alive and conscious. Talk ensued punctuated with exclamations of evil and greasy git and insufferable prat comments from said war heroes of the male variety.

Sara and Rea looked at each other before nodding and hopping up out of their chairs and hugging the two ex-evil slytherin's. This gesture of acceptance shocked every1 else into silence, which allowed the girls to comment, finally. Rea started. "Them? Us? Harry look at them, they are us, they made the same choice, took the same risk and made the same if not more sacrifices …" where Sara took over to help out "We're different but we're just the same all players in the game, you lot had better all grow up and get over what ever problems you have with each other, as in before we see you next, g'nite" and with that said the two girls headed off to the gryfinndor girls dorm, 'cos it was closest. Rea paused for a moment when they reached the door and made one last comment, "Oh and Harry … the power he knows not? That wasn't just you … that was all of us … the moment we could honestly say even under veritaserum that we'd rather die standing up for this cause then live on our knees … that moment added strength to our spells … we won because of the sheer number of people some who lived and some who died who had come to that point … the power to defeat him was all connected to his fear of death … we passed that point when we choose to die standing and give our all to the fight … don't knock those who made the same choice" And with that the two girls were gone from sight, and after a few minutes of silence Bumblebee said "well know we know what we are going to tell the press at least …we won the war because of all the people ready to die standing up for the light rather than live on their knees in the darkness …"

"Die standing" Harry murmured … "that's what mum's protection came from … her love which made her die standing to protect me … same with dad and all those others … we won because of everyone who ever choose to die standing up against the darkness … that's deep"

And if they had looked out the window they would have seen for a moment there the glowing spirits of Lily and James Potter, his arms wrapped around her as she sighed and said "He finally understands …" "Of course he does Lil's, he made the same choice for the same reason … Love … that's why all those people chose to do it"

Who do you love enough to make you willing and able to face your fears and fight, so they may have a chance to live?

For who would you die standing?

Yeah my story and malicious torture of helpless JKRowling characters, Shania Twain's song and at least one Lion King 2 quote … and probably anything else that sounds remotely good or decent and not trashy ramblings of a hormone-high teenaged girl trying to deal with uni and being the bitch queen from hell 'cos of it being that time of the month and yes I am insane so stop laughing at me … goddess I think I'm going to cry now … mood swings stink … umm if you haven't figured it out yet I only write when I have my period … yes I know it is really unhealthily irregular but I'm not dead yet soo who cares … Umm yeah read review mine and I'll return the favour

Luv ya all

DramaQueen4eva


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